freedom last night was full of alot of things.. interesting coincidences and hopeful breakthroughs..missing cars..and the magic of gravity ..all boiled into one little party.. theres so many angles to look at it on.. to me though the most important words came from my freakshow..aka my forever best friend, removed by circumstance.. to make this piece of the past a readers digest version of a novel, we were at our closest point.. planning our escape from mundane suburbia.. looking for the meaning of it all.. on the cusp of something it seemed.. and then she met this guy..and he came along and lied to me..and created lies to make me look bad.. and sucked her in with money and gifts and all those words you want to hear when youre looking for a spot to belong.. and she bit. she moved in with him.. and lost me. for quite awhile anyways.. i cried over this. i cried alot. it tore me up.. i was abandoned. our dreams were gone. but eventually i realized that was life. and that i couldnt cry over it anymore. i couldnt tear myself up over losing what i truly believed to be my other half. because it was getting me nowhere. so i got on with my life and my art..and eventually we called a truce to hang out.. and its gotten better i guess. or maybe thats because i stopped feeling. but either way.. last night.. it was truly changing. she admitted to us how possessive and crazy her boy is. we all knew it.. but she used to cover it with excuses. but hes gone too far. he constantly accuses her of cheating when she never has.. he gets pissed when shes not home from work immideately.. he insults her.. he emotionally abuses her more than anyone should.. and now she knows it.. and she at least tells us she wants to leave.. and it was like a whole new world had opened up.. like i felt like something could actually change. no one should have to only see their friends twice a year.. then be harrassed when theyre there past 9pm.. ill take all my good energy and give it to her if itll make her strong enough to leave.. so much more to write.. but i have to be to work way too soon. but i wanted to get some of this out.. to all those people who arent reading this.. heh. or maybe someone is.. and maybe someone knows what to do... crazier things have happened.. until later. |