i am a geek. wow. two entries in two days.. must be something in the water.. grr. or maybe because ive been spending way too much time infront of the computer i may as well write what im thinking about.. because its not going anywhere in my head.. so its another dreaded wednesday. but today wasnt so bad. i only slept a little because i spent way too long talking to a certain boy whos piqued my interest as of late.. im such a girl.. but i digress. i went to school for 3 fun filled hours of critique.. where i sit and stew and not say what i really think about peoples art.. because i have no backbone..and i second guess what i think alot. i can look at something and i know what comes to mind.. but my art words arent as shiny and polished as everyone elses.. or so it seems in my head. so i lived through the crit. and couldnt find kim for lunch so i sat through the visiting artist lecture.. which i always seem to nod off during the beginning.. and i did. and i find a note scrawled on a long piece of masking tape.. ontop of my table..from kim..who apparently couldnt find me.. phoo. we always miss each other unless we talk the night before.. because i alwyas assume she skipped class. becuase she has that freedom and i used all my get out of jail free cards way too early this semester.. so i decide since i dont have to personally meet with my next class or its scatterbrained teacher that ill go home early... but ill buy some art supplies so i can justify leaving early.. ill work at home right? right? suuure. so on the way home i find myself smiling a little more.. and looking for the boy ..knowing hes not actually near anywhere i might be.. but hes out there somewhere.. doing normal people things.. but its the details right? and theres something about knowing theres someone out there who gets it.. who understands what it means to be intelligent but silly as hell at the same time. its things like that that make a wednesday a little less wretched.. that and going home early of course ;) so my smitten self gets home.. and one of the ladies i work with calls and asks me to switch shifts with her tomorrow.. immediately i think sure.. but then ask her if the poor excuse for life, paul is working..and she says.. "you need to get over it already, i told him the same thing".. referring to the fact that i refuse to work with this waste of space. get over it!? get over it!? umm. heres a helpful tip for all you people trying to get someone to do a favor for you.. dont insult them.. dont make their quirks seem petty, regardless of how lame they are. i copped an attitude, just so she knew i wasnt happy. i told her sure id work her time.. but i will leave as soon as he arrives.. next! hrmph. so i saunter downstairs to get the mail.. mail is fun..and ive got art books and tapes on the way.. but todays mail was no fun. i had previously applied to this program to get a reduced rate to get the boy i live withs cat fixed..and i get a letter today from said program telling me i am denied, because they help 'families' who need help, 'students' like myself should ask my family for help. um. errr. hello. if it were that easy dont they think i would have done so? hey mom, whos a preschool teacher and makes no money and has a cat of her own.. can you swing me a hundred so i can get the cat the boy found under a dumpster fixed? yeah. its that easy.. im 22.. i shouldnt have to ask my mommy to help in such a situaion, i being responsible was trying to get help an alternate route and hence get denied. maybe if i was a trust fund baby like alot of kids in this city itd be another story. grr. i dont know why this went up my ass the wrong way but it did. maybe because on this programs homepage they make it seem like they are soo willing to help...and controlling the pet population is what they do.. and commmon. he found the cat under a dumpster when it was a week old!! have some compassion already.. i think ive sufficiently vented.. on a better note.. the sketchers conglomerate decided to take back the shitty sneakers they sent me that self destructed after a month of wear.. i just hope they send new ones promptly.. becuse other than these sneaks ive got a closet full of sandals and platforms.. neither good for winter weather.. one step forward.. two steps back. thursday = money.
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