just another commuter rail. my blue pen writes black! figures. summer is more or less done. yikes. im not gonna dwell on my slackdom, its not really gonna get me anywhere. you cant guilt an old dog into new tricks. i cant WAIT to get my hair done. its seriously killing me. as lame as that sounds. it doesnt make me cute, thats for sure - i not only have 5 inch roots, my hairs so long its not even messy when its dirty. work was bearable. i keep flipping back and forth between this new jeff kid and kevin. i try not to think about kevin too much, like ill jinx myself or something...or worse, ill just wish and make it into something its not. id rather be pleasantl surprised when it turns out good, yeaaahh. as for jeff.. well hes just this kid who i talk to online, some politics major, emo/punk boy. hes sorta fun, could prove fun, if nothing else. the other kevin seems to have disappeared completely since his newfound love came along. i guess he was fun while he was around. who needs that long distance shit anyways? even with friends it sucks. these russian ladies at work were too much. they made me go into the cooler for them, because it was cold in there. COLD! its a freaking cooler in a flower market. its supposed to be cold! i work there, sure. but its a help yourself policy.. im not there to be their slave..and they couldnt even get the words out, and they mutter to each other and point and exclaim, "THAT" to me... i almost broke. i was doing something else.. they had functioning arms and legs.. 2 seconds of cold wont kill anyone. i promise. their flowers were right inside the door.. they couldve held it open with their butt and grabbed them and never even went in.. but nooo.. gurrr. i think im almost looking forward to moving in with the boy.. it should be rad. at least a hell of alot less anal than last year with the indie rock nazis. who knows what its gonna do to our relationship but why think about that now? he knows how i feel, ill inevitably see other people. hopefully with the least amount of stress/pain etc. i can cause him. who knows, he could get sick of me too. stranger things have happened. in a perfect world he would realize i make a better friend than a girlfriend and kevin would realize he never stopped loving me, and we'd run off in punk rock bliss. ahh. the beauty of it all. |